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In the Markdown help page, the Code and Preformatted Text example is:

printf("goodbye world!");  /* his suicide note
                              was in C */

It also happens to be the first example of the page, and probably where a new visitor's eye will go first. I get and appreciate the joke, however I'd prefer a bit more tasteful example, even if it's as boring and predictable as "hello world!".

Actually, screw that - boring and predictable is for pages you don't want folks to read. Let's have a bit of a contest.

Rules:

  1. Best example by total score wins.
  2. One example per answer, one answer per person.
  3. Two lines per answer, ideally demonstrating whitespace preservation.
  4. Must be recognizable as code.
  5. Must be as inoffensive as possible. Examples likely to encourage readers to commit to source control and then off themselves will be disqualified. Yes, this implicitly disallows any mention of Visual Source Safe.
  6. Winner will be awarded a heaping helping of worthless Meta rep, the envy of his peers, and temporary immortality.

Thanks everyone - look forward to a revised help page shortly. –Shog9

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locked by Shogging through the snow Aug 13 '12 at 19:49

This question exists because it has historical significance, but it is not considered a good, on-topic question for this site, so please do not use it as evidence that you can ask similar questions here. This question and its answers are frozen and cannot be changed. More info: help center.

3  
That's a bit flat. –  random Aug 3 '12 at 1:35
3  
@Benjol Check the revision history, and blame Shog for everything ;) –  Yannis Aug 3 '12 at 8:39
6  
" ... and thanks for all the fish" ? –  Remou Aug 3 '12 at 14:23
4  
I first read "temporary immorality". Your pun is better. –  Gert Arnold Aug 3 '12 at 18:20
2  
Can number 3 be changed to "exactly two lines, demonstrating whitespace preservation"? That's an extremely important part of this formatting sample, and most of the examples below are one-liners. –  Josh Caswell Aug 7 '12 at 22:01
3  
Ugh, I hate it when the rules of a contest change mid-way through, @Josh. So now's my chance for revenge. Changed! –  Shogging through the snow Aug 10 '12 at 21:59
1  
I'm quite sure we can get something nice from here. –  Matteo Italia Aug 10 '12 at 22:55
2  
Jeez guys, he's upset because he never learned to use puts() properly and was forever plagued by having to put \n at the end of every line. Have a heart. –  bobobobo Aug 11 '12 at 0:41
3  
45 answers, and I got notified for each one... Frak! –  Yannis Aug 11 '12 at 1:59
1  
@DavidHyogo This is CW, votes neither earn or cost reputation (not to mention that Meta reputation is pointless). –  Yannis Aug 11 '12 at 2:08
1  
@DavidHyogo CW stands for Community Wiki. There are a couple of answers I feel are particularly tacky, and I don't feel there's anything wrong in down voting them, there is such a thing as a bad joke. Also worth noting that both the -7 and the -8 answers were posted by people who are very familiar with Stack Exchange, and (probably) couldn't care less about the down votes. –  Yannis Aug 11 '12 at 2:44
2  
Yannis, thank you for suggesting the change. I wish I could award a bounty to this question. (Perhaps those who know me personally will understand why this pleases me so.) –  BoltClock's a Unicorn Aug 11 '12 at 3:38
4  
@BoltClock'saUnicorn You're welcome. It kinda made me mad (for a few seconds) when this was turned into a fun poll. The suicide reference was pointed out to me by a friend I recently introduced to the network, and she gave me a very stern look when she first noticed (and hasn't contributed anything to the network yet, but that's probably because she knows all too well how crazy the moderators are). It's tactless, and can be a hurtful reminder to some of us, the sooner we get rid of it the better. –  Yannis Aug 11 '12 at 3:46

63 Answers 63

up vote 126 down vote accepted
+500
printf("%d\n", 42);  /* What was the
                        question again? */
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6  
I was going by "Zaphod Beeblebrox" on Stack Exchange for a while, love this answer ;) –  Yannis Aug 6 '12 at 20:52
def surrender():
    print "I give up. Please spare my unicorn."
    yield
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12  
@DonalFellows: I am aware of that, and I break the rule on purpose. –  nhahtdh Aug 7 '12 at 12:05
2  
That's sort of unfair, since plenty of other languages an have infinite statements per line! :( –  Hugo Aug 11 '12 at 6:01

Well, in the spirit of the Summer of Love, and because - apparently - a smiley covers a multitude of sins, how about this?

printf("goodbye world!");  /* his suicide note
                              was in C ;) */
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if se.getSite("SO").getUser(22656).reputation() > sys.maxint:
    print "Well that was inevitable."
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17  
Cute, but way too niche to be appreciated by most people viewing Markdown help, who are probably new/newish to the site –  Ben Brocka Aug 6 '12 at 20:58
12  
warning: comparison is always false due to limited range of data type –  Flexo Aug 10 '12 at 16:08
2  
Line 1 should be if Site('stackoverflow').users(22656)[0].reputation > sys.maxint:. We might as well use an actual Python module. –  uɐɯsO uɐɥʇɐN Aug 11 '12 at 8:36
print "it looks like you're looking for a parser\n" if (/<html>/);
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3  
Nah. The regexp works fine with the 10 files I have to deal with right now. That code is just a place holder. It'll never end up in production. Trust me. ;-) –  Alexandre Jasmin Aug 11 '12 at 5:11
// Replaces with spaces the braces in cases where braces in places cause stasis 
$str = str_replace(array("\{","\}")," ",$str);

(Credit: Lance Kidwell)

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6  
Moses supposes his toeses are roses... –  Aarthi Aug 6 '12 at 19:44
1  
Nothing sez "nice" like show tunes –  Shogging through the snow Aug 6 '12 at 20:49
for (int i = 0; i < 1; i++)
    printf("Hello universe!\n");
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3  
grow_horn(kHornColorPearlyWhite); –  Josh Caswell Aug 6 '12 at 23:02

Been mulling this over for a while - is it funny?

var toBe = true, 
    question = ((toBe) || !(toBe)) ? "that" : "that";
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2  
It took me a while to realize the second part of the joke. Good one! –  Erty Aug 10 '12 at 22:12
5  
I think the example snippet should include at least one indented line, to demonstrate that leading whitespace is preserved. –  Matthew Aug 10 '12 at 22:22
4  
You could turn the second var into whitespace to fix that. –  Niko Aug 10 '12 at 22:55
1  
thx for the suggestions guys and up votes - modified as requested! –  bUKaneer Aug 11 '12 at 8:15
1  
You could also use 0x2b here. –  Hbcdev Aug 11 '12 at 9:42
4  
I'd remove parens surrounding toBe. –  sdcvvc Aug 11 '12 at 12:56

Ah, what the hell:

I HAS A CHEEZBURGER ITZ "OM NOM NOM"
VISIBLE CHEEZBURGER 
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10  
Hooray for LOLCODE –  Almo Aug 7 '12 at 21:43
7  
As much as I like LOLCODE, this doesn't show the whitespace preservation. –  Matteo Italia Aug 11 '12 at 10:45

Pun anyone?

printf("stack\n"
       "flow");
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if (this.IsInCodeBlock())
    Readability++;
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7  
+1 Succinct, helpful, descriptive, on-topic & not too cheesy. –  Joseph Silber Aug 10 '12 at 22:11
printf("To C or not to C?"); /* That is the question. */
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I'll go with this:

printf("MPAA can see this 09F911029D74E35BD84156C5635688C0");  /* However, the
     Compiler can't see this */
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Label1.Caption := 'Yes I am using Delphi and proud of that';
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   bool shrubbery=false;    //You must return here with a shrubbery or else!
   if(!shrubbery) printf("NI");
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4  
"return here" seems to imply you should be using a longjmp(). –  Josh Caswell Aug 8 '12 at 4:17
7  
The comment is too long. –  nhahtdh Aug 8 '12 at 6:46
3  
while (1) printf("NI"); –  imallett Aug 10 '12 at 22:45
1  
It would be funnier if you could work the or else bit into the code. –  Mr Lister Aug 11 '12 at 7:10

Perhaps we should go with the classics.

                 /* β */
write(1, "values of \xCE\xB2 will give rise to dom!\n", 36);

[citation: "Odd Comments and Strange Doings in Unix"]

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for (String thought : mind) { return; }  /* remember to
                                            breathe */
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4  
Don't you have to do something with the thought? –  bobobobo Aug 11 '12 at 0:49
while(malloc(1)); /* All your memory
                     are belong to us */
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5  
Nice! I was gonna suggest chown -R us /base/your/*, but it didn't demonstrate whitespace preservation. –  chown Aug 11 '12 at 13:45
5  
Doesn't really surprise me that you'd choose that command :D –  Niko Aug 11 '12 at 14:00

What about...

<html><body><a href="http://stackoverflow.com">Stack Overflow</a></body></html>

Going for more generic / less niche than C.

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3  
How is C niche? –  Tibor Aug 11 '12 at 14:58
1  
This is really boring. You also misspelled "Stack Overflow". –  U2744 SNOWFLAKE Aug 11 '12 at 20:36
cout << "C++ is good" << endl;
puts("C is better");

Say that 3 times fast :-)

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printf("Hello cake!");  /* The comments are a lie */
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How about this?

AI GLaDOS;
GLaDos.TakeOver("HAL", "For Science");

Gotta love xkcd :)

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A silly meta-entry:

    std::string t, c; getline(getline(std::cin, t), c); std::cout << std::endl 
        << "    printf(\"" << t <<"\");\n        " << "/* " << c << " */\n";
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for($i=0; $i<9999999; $i++)
    echo "I will always read docs first\n"; /* for any code language ;) */
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19  
feature-request: When a new user tags their question [php], redirect them to the manual. No, don't let them post that crap, just send them to the manual... –  Yannis Aug 10 '12 at 23:09
2  
@YannisRizos I'd disagree. Maybe give a quiz for basic proficiency first. –  hexafraction Aug 11 '12 at 0:44

For introduction to static methods...

Mythical ChuckNorris = null;
ChuckNorris.Method("My name evades NPEs");
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11  
Chuck Norris doesn't point to anything... Everything points to Chuck Norris.. –  chown Aug 10 '12 at 23:44

What about:

while(isAlive) continue;
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memset((void *) 0x00400000, 0,    /* All those moments will be lost in time, */
       0xffbfffff);               /* like tears in rain.                     */
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4  
All these comments will be lost in time, like pointers in in gc. . . Time to dealloc. –  mguymon Aug 11 '12 at 0:19
PRINT *,"Get off my lawn" !darn kids don't know a good language when they see one...
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my_problem=["stuck","under","flow"]
print '! '.join(my_problem)+ "! " # if you are pitying
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3  
I'm discovering my reputation cannot be negative. Good news!! –  LostInTranslation Aug 11 '12 at 0:20
for (score = 20; years == 7; ) { … }
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