Write a really long, nonspecific rant in the comments, indicating your dislike of watermelon and your affinity for Madonna. After a while, your opponent will forget what he was talking about and will agree with you that Madonna is a pretty cool guy who signs albums and doesn't afraid of anything because of that kamikaze watermelon that almost ruined your sofa that one time.
What was up with that watermelon, anyway? Do you think someone promised to pay his family a lot of money to attack your Batman-themed cushions? Or maybe it was a matter of honour. I have heard that Batman is disgraceful in the eyes of large, Japanese melons.
Which reminds me, remember that restaurant we visited the other day? What was it called? Shinobu something? Senjougahara something? Well, it doesn't really matter what it was called. The point is the waitress there was amazing. What was her name? Kimono something? Well, it doesn't really matter what her name was. The point is she was amazing. I've never been served tempura so incredibly fast. And the food was so good it was like I was at the opposite of Pizza Hut or something.
I figure the opposite of pizza is rice, with corn mixed into it. But not a lot of corn. If you add too much corn to anything, you end up accidentally making pizza all over again. Remind me to ask my biocheminomy professor about that the next time I'm in class.
I haven't been to class in like 4 years, unless you count that time I went to my friend's class after I had graduated to meet the prof he said was cool. Going back to your old learning grounds long after you've graduated is a pretty neat experience. Everyone looks a lot shorter than you remember. And there are fewer squirrels around the trees. But they're bigger than they used to be.
They must have merged to form supersquirrels. Or rather, they must be in the process of merging to form a single, monumental ultrasquirrel, and supersquirrels are simply an intermediate step in this metamorphosis.
I'd like it if the Japanese made a movie about Ultrasquirrel, with Madonna singing the title theme, but it would probably offend Batman-hating watermelons the world over. You wanna go for some pizza?