(In my defense, I had searched Stack Overflow earlier and hadn't found a good enough answer, and was getting ready to ask the question myself, but thought I'd do some more Google digging first).
I scrolled down to the bottom of the page to actually see the answers, and what do I find?
The best answer on Experts Exchange... was a link to a question on Stack Overflow!
Haha. I literally lolled for a few seconds and then came here to share this wonderful find.
Scroll down to the very last answer posted by andrejonker. Classic!