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There are people who I feel harassed by on SO. I've flagged their comments and now I have the "don't listen to this guy's flags" tag on me. The moderators of SO feel that the behavior is A-OK and my issues are ignorable...fine. I've done everything I can and should do to "improve the community" regarding this, now I just want MY SO experience to remain unfettered by brown stain. It's a well reasoned argument that says I should try flagging and working through channels, but when that fails what is one supposed to do?

What I want now is to stop receiving notices of their @ comments. All that feature does for these people is enable them to harass me directly every time I look at my "messages". At the very least I should have the option of not having their harassing BS shoved in my face in this manner. It enables them and encourages me to the desire to reply, which will of course just get me insta-face raped.

I've helped a lot of people on SO. I don't really feel like I deserve to be harassed by people I'd rather pretend don't even exist. The argument against allowing me to ignore them across the whole site makes some sense. I don't like it, but OK. However, having my "mailbox" full of their crap is a totally different story. Even if you disagree with me, feel that I'm overreacting, being childish, whatever...maybe I am. I don't even care anymore, there just some individuals on SO I want nothing to do with at this point. Isn't that my right? I get suspended for calling people trolls...well stop helping them troll me!

There's only so many times you get to call me hypocrite, nasty-man, and all the other bogus crap I've put up with from these people before I want them to just be gone.

It seems to me like a such a minor thing that would improve the SO experience by miles, at least for this user.

Thanks.

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Examples would help people respond to this, I think. –  Neil Fein Feb 23 '11 at 23:58
    
I don't want to start crap by listing all the people on SO I don't like. I'm sure they know and if the feeling's not mutual then they've got problems. All listing them would do is turn this into a flame fest when all I want is the ability to not receive messages from them anymore. –  anon Feb 24 '11 at 0:07
    
Possible Duplicate: meta.stackexchange.com/questions/2065/… –  Robert Harvey Feb 24 '11 at 0:18
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I have been hanging around forums for quite a few years, sometimes people pop up that grate or who have incompatible personalities, but if you like the forum, it is best to just wait patiently, because eventually either the person will go away, or you will find you can deal with it. –  Remou Feb 24 '11 at 0:47
    
I was wrong. This is a bad idea. Without knowing certain people are flame commenting my answers I can't delete them before mods decide I'm disturbing the community. –  anon Feb 24 '11 at 18:43
    
Not sure why you can't just ignore their replies if you don't care what they have to say. People do that successfully all the time. If you're letting them get under your skin, the problem is yours and they're winning. If they're really doing something offensive (true harassment, as Robert Harvey points out), the mods can and should do something about it. –  Cody Gray Feb 26 '11 at 12:41

1 Answer 1

Harassment is a strong word. If that is genuinely what these other users are doing, flag their posts for moderator attention. But we will only act if, in our judgement, it constitutes actual harassment.

Whenever someone posts a question like this, my first instinct is to review their profile on Meta, and see if they "get" what StackOverflow is all about. Alas, in your case...

Websites are like televisions. If you don't like the programming, you can always turn them off.

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...and you're not one of the people I've helped. This is, unfortunately, the kind of response I've come to expect from SO's mods. Breath one: "Leave!" Breath two: "We hope you stick around." This is a minor thing I've suggested. I'm not asking for you to agree with me. I'm not checking in to see if you think I "get it". I'm not looking for your acceptance. In fact I don't even want it. I find this response quite frankly very offensive. You are a moderator. "You don't get it, maybe you should leave," is a totally and utterly inappropriate reply to a feature request. –  anon Feb 24 '11 at 0:23
    
Just because I'm bothered by a FEW people doesn't mean I should be required to leave in order to escape them. If that's the kind of environment you wish to foster well, congratulations. Your kind of attitude is exactly what is needed. –  anon Feb 24 '11 at 0:26
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Your question is akin to saying "I don't want to change myself, I want the whole rest of the world to change for me." You seem to get a negative response from people. Why do you think that is? There are many others who manage to get along here quite nicely. I'm not asking you to leave, I'm saying it might be better for your sanity if you do. –  Robert Harvey Feb 24 '11 at 0:27
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Or, you can take a deep breath, smile, ignore the people who have already judged who you are, and approach this whole thing with a fresh perspective. –  Robert Harvey Feb 24 '11 at 0:28
    
No, that isn't what I've asked for. I've not asked you to ban others. I've not asked you to do ANYTHING to anyone else. I've simply asked for a simple feature to a website so that I don't have to have a message box full of nonsense from people I don't want anything to do with. I've not asked you to remove their comments, force them not to reply to me, or limit the participation of any other person! And yes, you did just suggest I should leave. That's EXACTLY what you did. Over a feature request. –  anon Feb 24 '11 at 0:32
    
You won't get the feature request. It was already discussed here: meta.stackexchange.com/questions/2065/…. Why would SE spend thousands of dollars to put in a feature just so you can feel less uncomfortable? –  Robert Harvey Feb 24 '11 at 0:34
    
If leaving SO permanently is, in fact, what I have to do then that's what I'll do. The people I regularly help will no longer benefit from my assistance. Those who harassed me off the board will get what they want. I figured I'd suggest a minor change that might help me avoid having to do that and instead of thanks ... well... –  anon Feb 24 '11 at 0:35
    
First, that's not the same feature. Second, because they want people to be able to participate without being uncomfortable. If that's not true, feel free to ignore the request. If it's too expensive, feel free to not implement it. Suggesting that I go away is more than a little heavy handed. –  anon Feb 24 '11 at 0:37

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