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I have recently opened my second bounty question...

For being a bounty, I've received a lot off-topic answers... finally, my patience was over and I've made a slightly irritated comment to an answer:

What is exactly your mental problem on interpreting my question?

Ok, I regret doing this and I won't do it anymore. But since it is the first time I've done a thing like this in a long time participation to the site, and I've never received any advice from the moderators, don't you think that a seven days suspension it's just too long? I've always tried to be educated and never hurt anyone. Also this suspension prevents me from interacting with other answers to the bounty, and then to obtaining an answer for which I've spent 50 rep... I think this is just exaggerated, and I ask to the moderators that are going to read to enable again my account, making the promise to never do a negative comment again in the future.

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    I am a civil and adult person... I can admit errors if anyone tell me... now you say that I "deserve" seven days punitions like little child... I simply don't understand this logic. – Lore Jul 10 '18 at 14:23
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    "and never hurt anyone" Given that you're admitting to hurting people earlier in your post, why make suck a blatantly false (even by your own admission) statement. – Servy Jul 10 '18 at 14:23
  • ok... i USUALLY don't hurt anyone... but we are humans, and sometimes it can happen. Or you are all perfect? – Lore Jul 10 '18 at 14:24
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    @Lore "I am a civil and adult person" Again, you have already demonstrated that that's not the case. If you don't like being suspended then don't do things that merit suspending your account. It's really that simple. – Servy Jul 10 '18 at 14:24
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    @Lore I didn't say I was perfect, but I also don't claim that I should be immune from the consequences of my own actions when I make a mistake, or when I repeat mistakes. – Servy Jul 10 '18 at 14:25
  • @Lore: No I'm far from perfect. But if you commit the crime, you do the time. Why not read this during your week off? en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crime_and_Punishment (And the book, not just the Wikipedia page.) – Bathsheba Jul 10 '18 at 14:25
  • Suppose I leave your comment right here, replacing my question with our comments. How would you feel? – rene Jul 10 '18 at 14:26
  • I think it's just to rigid to punish a "crime" (!!!!!!!!!!) in a moment of rage, and for the first time in more than an year on SO. Yer it was rude... but there are comments a way more rude that can be made. But if this is the logic, I understand the motivation of the progressively failure of this site. And i thought that you were trying to be more "user friendly"... – Lore Jul 10 '18 at 14:29
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    @Lore: Now you are starting to reveal yourself as rather truculent. What exactly are you trying to achieve here? – Bathsheba Jul 10 '18 at 14:30
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    Let me try again. You made a mistake. True. You admitted it. So you should know that you should be punished for that mistake. So the question here is only "what punishment?". You think it should be only a warning, or maximum one day suspension, right? Well, that's where you are wrong. – ShaWiz Jul 10 '18 at 14:31
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    Yes there was another one bad comment, but was against a language (Java) and not against some people. But I'm leaving this post: I don't think is the case to accept "life lessons" by SO users that never knew me. You can control my question/answers by yourself, and see if I've been good and useful to community. Then maybe, like many other people outside, I will partecipate less (or I won't partecipate anymore) to SO. If this site in the future will go worse, make yourself some questions. – Lore Jul 10 '18 at 14:35
  • Whether it's too long is ultimately a matter of opinion. – curiousdannii Jul 15 '18 at 7:02
14

I'm the moderator who suspended you. Clearly you crossed a line in several comments and I wasn't happy with the fact you had an open bounty on a question when I made the decision to suspend you. The 7 days is warranted, as your comments were deteriorating and the last one was particularly bad and I want to make that clear, the site has zero tolerance to outright abuse.

After discussion with another mod, I've removed the bounty. You now have the opportunity to place another bounty, when the suspension finishes, that you will be in a position to award. I can see your spirit of trying to help people in your history, which is why I've shown this leniency with the bounty.

We're not trying to punish people, but stop bad behaviour from accelerating and drawing the line, so people can learn. It's important to remember everybody makes mistakes, it's how we learn from them that counts. So keep moving forward.

  • Can you tell me, in private if you want, what were others bad comments? The only comments I remember to be a little angry was two or three... but there was mostly against the language Java and not specifical users, if I remember well. If there are some other "bad comments" that I'm not aware of and you can make me aware of them, maybe I will understand better the reasons behind suspension. – Lore Jul 10 '18 at 15:35
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    @Lore yes I'll reply to your message. – Yvette Colomb Jul 10 '18 at 15:36
  • I've seen the private reply. Ok, I admit that maybe I've understimated the rudeness factor sometimes, but certainly not in the majority of my interventions, and the "bad comments" was when I was answering to some provocative or apparently too harsh behaviours from some users. Now I understand better the motivations behind suspension. – Lore Jul 10 '18 at 15:56
  • Said that, I will think in the next seven days about this suspension, and I will make a decision about my future partecipation. If I decide to return active like before, I obviously assure an effort to improve the acceptability of the comments. For now, I thank you for the disponibility. – Lore Jul 10 '18 at 15:57
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    @Lore the site is cracking down on poor behaviour and it's a state of flux, but we all need to move on with it. As I said, we all make mistakes. If you see something upsetting, downvote it or flag it or move on or come back when you're calm. It's better not to engage if you know you're getting upset. – Yvette Colomb Jul 10 '18 at 15:59
  • it's the ending of this period of ban and I have reflected. I'm sorry, but I think that this disrespectful behavior versus a generally willful user is not acceptable. Hope that in the future SO will be more user friendly not only in words, but in facts, with simple improvements like I've suggested in a comment below and I will now report as a post scriptum. Until then, my return as an active user will be very difficult. – Lore Jul 16 '18 at 10:34
  • I think for the first time is good an automatic mail with automatic elencation of the comments to avoid. For most of the civilized people is sufficient. Otherwise, why don't think about a first ban of... uhm... 3 days?? I think it will be sufficient for most of people that don't give importance to the mail. THEN you can escalate. A seven days ban minimum gives a sense of unreal rigidity, and be sure that I personally would have stopped as soon as I received first mail... and because this wasn't the first "undesidered" comment, they had all the time to send it. – Lore Jul 16 '18 at 10:35
  • It's simple: moderators start seeing flagged comments, and at a certain number of confirmed flag it goes automatic mail. At another number automatic ban of 3 days... and so on... in particular cases, mods can enforce suspensions, regular cases are treated automatically. I can't see difficulties in this approach. I can't see difficulties on substituing default 7 days with automatic mail. – Lore Jul 16 '18 at 10:35
  • @Lore that's the site's policy. Unless it's changed, I abide by the framework – Yvette Colomb Jul 16 '18 at 13:26
  • It's surely not your fault, Yvette. You have been very kind and helpful, so I thank you. – Lore Jul 16 '18 at 13:28
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    Move forward, you'll be fine and thanks for those nice words – Yvette Colomb Jul 16 '18 at 13:30
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That comment is really completely out of order. We cannot have the Stack Exchange sites littered with profanities.

Seven days seems fair to me.

The moderators do a great job; particularly on this occasion.

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    There are no profanities in that comment. It is rude and not nice etc, absolutely, but not profane. – terdon Jul 10 '18 at 14:57
  • @terdon: Well, I say it is. My mother is a professor of English Literature at Oxford University (yes, I'm such a disappointment to her). I could ask her. But I'm sure she'd agree with me on this one. Some words become profane depending on their context. – Bathsheba Jul 10 '18 at 14:59
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    Come on over to the ELU chat room, if you like, and we can discuss the nuances of meaning. But your mother's laurels notwithstanding, rude is not the same as profane and the issue here is not about profanity or vulgar speech, but about tone and civility. So calling it profane just muddies the waters. – terdon Jul 10 '18 at 15:43
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I'd say you got off lightly in this case.

Use this as a teachable moment that is is not ok (!) to insinuate other people have mental illnesses because they didn't give you exactly what you were looking for for free.

8

I'd just ask you to seriously consider if you're taking this from the right perspective. You ask,

Don't you think that a seven days suspesion it's just too long?

...which implies that you inherently ought to have the right to use Stack Exchange. However, Stack Exchange was not designed uniquely for you. It was designed for all users on the internet who follow its policies.

Allow me to stretch your thinking in the other direction for a minute.

Since one of Stack Exchange's policies is be nice, and by your own admission, you failed to uphold that policy, why should you be permitted to continue to participate at all? Obviously, I am not advocating a permanent ban for a single offense; I'm simply trying to stretch your thinking a bit. From reading your question, you appear to have understood what you did wrong and intend to do better. For that reason, Stack Exchange has been designed to give "second chances."

So I honestly think that a seven day ban is totally reasonable: it gives you an opportunity to sit back and think about the way you interact with other users on the system. By the time the period is over, you should be able to come back with a fresh resolve to follow the policies to the best of your ability.

2

Seven days is the standard duration for a first-time suspension across the network. The moderators didn't choose a time period to be harsh; they took the default.

Suspension durations increase for subsequent suspensions, just FYI. If you learn from this incident and move on, no harm done.

  • I think for the first time is good an automatic mail with automatic elencation of the comments to avoid. For most of the civilized people is sufficient. Otherwise, why don't think about a first ban of... uhm... 3 days?? I think it will be sufficient for most of people that don't give importance to the mail. THEN you can escalate. A seven days ban minimum gives a sense of unreal rigidity, and be sure that I personally would have stopped as soon as I received first mail... and because this wasn't the first "undesidered" comment, they had all the time to send it. – Lore Jul 11 '18 at 8:51
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    @Lore you have to bear in mind that SO mods are swamped with work. On a lot of smaller stack sites, the process would likely have taken place something more like that. However, from my understanding, on SO there is such a massive volume of low quality users who have no desire to improve that there is no way whatsoever for them to "keep an eye" on them. I definitely get your point, but saying they had "all the time" is a stretch: they're volunteers who have real jobs, and with hundreds of flags by the day, they stay busy. – anonymous2 Jul 11 '18 at 13:21
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    It's simple: moderators start seeing flagged comments, and at a certain number of confirmed flag it goes automatic mail. At another number automatic ban of 3 days... and so on... in particular cases, mods can enforce suspensions, regular cases are treated automatically. I can't see difficulties in this approach. I can't see difficulties on substituing default 7 days with automatic mail. – Lore Jul 11 '18 at 13:56
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I think it had been a better decision, if the mod takes care on this and gives you at least a little overlap between the expiration of the bounty and your suspension term.

I think she didn't take care on that because so is it going SE-wide.

However, it was far not the worst one. Having only some hundreds reps, you are thinking yet that 50 rep is a lot. But, if you had posted an answer every day while you are suspended, you could have collected easily that 50.

There are things far worse that. For example, imagine a mod saying that your comments are too hostile, and suspends you for a month. Ok, then you get back, write much lesser and much nicer comments. Then the mod suspends you for a year, saying that he understood it so, that you should absolutely no commenting. Such things are possible on the SE, you survived it quite easily.

If there is a suspension or a mod warning, you have also a chance to talk to a mod directly. It is a rare, and costly chance. Don't miss it! If you think you deserved it, accept the responsibility and get back. If not, try to convince him about your view, or explain him, what you did and why.

In your case, I had tried to explain the bounty problem to the mod. Having an ongoing bounty is surely not a reason to avoid a suspension, but having your first crime, and saying that the problem of the bounty would make the punishment much harsher as it was intended, might have been a strong argument for the mod to do something.

A reduction or an elimination of the suspension is nearly unheard on this way, but so you have the option to let him/her understand, what you did and why.

Don't worry on the downvote pressure and the many, quite antagonistic answers what you got here. The SE community is, unfortunately, not very friendly in many important matters, maybe an improvement of the community would be here very useful. Until it doesn't happen, the best what you can do: ignore it, and don't stop your activities. Exactly this is what the community needs.

  • Oh, finally a good common sense answer in SO. But beware: the common sense is usually downvoted here. P. S.: i had the bounty refounded ;) – Lore Jul 13 '18 at 5:16
  • @Lore Thanks :-) Btw, 7 days is really not much. The catastrophe is the 1 year, 3 months (rarely applied) are painful. 1 month means in most cases, that you are only 1 step away for the yearlong ban. It can also mean that the mods are actively seeking your permanent elimination. – peterh Jul 13 '18 at 6:49
  • @Lore Btw, on most sites the mods are not very evil, they only need to follow the "community consent". And your problems arise in many cases because your view differs from it. Explain the mod your view, what you are doing and why, it helps a lot. – peterh Jul 13 '18 at 6:51

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