I know you must think I am very weird, but I once met a user I liked on Stack Overflow that answered one of my questions. If I asked them for their number (through the comments), would I get banned or suspended? What if I asked them for their socials or something else like that?

I tried searching if this question had already been answered, but unfortunately no, so I am very curious!

  • 8
    I'm pretty sure that this constitutes "patterns of inappropriate social contact" in the Code of Conduct. Dec 1 '20 at 3:13
  • 1
    Does this answer your question? Any way to send a personal message to another user?
    – gnat
    Dec 1 '20 at 7:23
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    On Meta downvotes are often used to disagree with the premise of the question rather than indicating that the question is bad. So most likely the downvoters don't like the idea of being hit on.
    – greg-449
    Dec 1 '20 at 8:11
  • Can't delete, sorry, there are good answers to your question here.
    – Ollie
    Dec 3 '20 at 22:43
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    I suggest you stop editing your question to add in noise about downvotes and deleting: You're only creating your own problems by bumping your post through editing.
    – Tinkeringbell Mod
    Dec 4 '20 at 7:15

That would be a bad idea. You shouldn't do that, and any such comments should be flagged as, at minimum, "no longer needed."

Stack Exchange is about questions and answers. It's right in the tour: "Ask questions, get answers, no distractions." Comments are just in service of improving questions and answers.

Hitting on a user or otherwise asking for off-site contact information has nothing to do with that, and thus has no place in the comments of a post.

  • Do you think I'll get suspended if I did? Dec 2 '20 at 15:12
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    @RebeccaBibye I have no idea. That would be up to whether a moderator saw it and how they decided to handle it. That said, you shouldn't base your decision on whether you'd get suspended for a single offense; there are plenty of things you shouldn't do that might not get you banned on the first offense.
    – Ryan M
    Dec 4 '20 at 7:19

I'll offer a corollary.

Any information that a user has in their profile can be used to get in touch with them if they so desire. They would still have the ability to decline anyway.

Note that the Stack Exchange network is not social media nor a dating site, so any messages to that effect on the network aren't acceptable.

Besides, it's still silly to ask. You don't know anything about that person just from either their avatar or display name to establish if they're someone you'd want to approach romantically.

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    I also know their level of knowledge (at least somewhat) and their willingness to help, but your reply definitely makes sense. Thanks for answering! Dec 1 '20 at 3:34
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    Glasses are sexy. Don't underestimate what you can discern from the avatar alone!
    – Cody Gray
    Dec 1 '20 at 7:01
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    @CodyGray: So...I'm taking that to mean that I need to put glasses on my Gravatar. Got it.
    – Makoto
    Dec 1 '20 at 17:24
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    Only if you want people to hit on you.
    – Cody Gray
    Dec 2 '20 at 5:40
  • It's a thought experiment. Someone wants to hit on a Gravatar pattern that I happened to like and colorized some many years ago. Doesn't bother me any one way or another @CodyGray :D
    – Makoto
    Dec 2 '20 at 16:03

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