We've all seen, and most have participated in, more than one open/close war. Things are said. Feelings are hurt. It's very personal for many of us, and yet so impersonal due to the lack of face time with your accusers.

So I'm asking that SO implement full-contact moderation. Once a question gets 5 votes to close, and 5 subsequent votes to open, the question is locked until the affected parties meet in a brawl type setting, where they can duke it out.

This way others online can see which side has greater numbers or is more likely to win (due to the impact of their arguments on the opposing force) and choose which side of the debate they'll take in real time.

There may be implementation details to be worked out, but I think the idea is generally sound and wanted to open a discussion before officially making a feature request.

  • Added the appropriate tag :) Jan 15, 2010 at 23:02
  • +1 For a sense of humor.
    – C. Ross
    Feb 19, 2010 at 20:38

7 Answers 7


There is an accepted, recognized and proven way to solve any dispute.

You fight like a dairy farmer.

  • 3
    +1, Guybrush Threepwood and Largo are missed!
    – Aiden Bell
    Jan 16, 2010 at 1:19
  • Oh yeah, well you fight like a cow! I sense my next name change ... Only ... Guybrush ... or LeChuck?
    – John Rudy
    Jan 16, 2010 at 1:56
  • 2
    Who downvoted Monkey Island? Poor soul, I will pray for you ...
    – John Rudy
    Jan 16, 2010 at 7:16
  • 9
    "How appropriate, you fight like a cow!"
    – Blorgbeard
    Jan 16, 2010 at 20:52
  • @blorgbeard: Dangit, you're right; I screwed up the first part of it! Ah, good times. I've been (off-and-on) playing the redo of Monkey Island on XBox Arcade recently ... Such fond memories.
    – John Rudy
    Jan 17, 2010 at 7:19
  • cough I think StackOverflow should also add the alt-text of an image as a title tag, so that xkcd-style tooltips work :P Jan 17, 2010 at 9:50
  • 2
    "People fall at my feet when they see me coming."
    – Gnoupi
    Jan 17, 2010 at 13:28
  • 2
    @Gnoupi: "Even BEFORE they smell your breath?"
    – John Rudy
    Jan 17, 2010 at 15:41
  • @Michael: I get the tooltip on hover.
    – John Rudy
    Jan 17, 2010 at 15:42
  • Love that game. Jan 17, 2010 at 16:54
  • 3
    I added it after getting the hint on how to do that on meta.stackexchange.com/questions/35995 :-) Jan 17, 2010 at 17:03
  • 2
    I just coughed cider. A true blast from my mis-spent past. Jan 17, 2010 at 22:29
  • 4
    @Marc You can make it your mis-spent present again :-) store.steampowered.com/app/32360 Jan 17, 2010 at 23:11
  • @Michael: Ah yes, that's the remix I'm referring to -- available on XBox Live too. :)
    – John Rudy
    Jan 18, 2010 at 3:30
  • Hurray, a winner is you!
    – Pollyanna
    Mar 17, 2010 at 3:31


Rabble http://xs.to/image-613A_4B510A74.jpg

Am I right in thinking a serious answer isn't required?

[There was a massive body of text here. But I think I missed the tone of the question]

  • I know what this is from but I do have to say that (unfortunately) this is how I see every single Wikipedia editor in my mind.
    – Esko
    Jan 17, 2010 at 20:36
  • This is how I see anyone on the internet, until I know otherwise. Better safe than sorry!
    – Aiden Bell
    Jan 18, 2010 at 17:15

The first rule of Fight ClubStack Overflow is that you do not talk about Fight ClubStack Overflow.

Now I see a lot of new faces tonight, so it looks like some of you have been breaking rule #1.

It has to be bare-knuckle brawling until one opponent taps out. Two men to a fight. Only one fight at a time. And if this your first night, you have to fight.

Boss: Is that your blood?

Protagonist: Some of it, yeah.


fight! http://img709.imageshack.us/img709/6684/nerdfightg.jpg

Paint it red ... no .. paint it green ... fight!

  • 3
    Damn, a man-purse!
    – Aiden Bell
    Jan 16, 2010 at 1:21

It may not need be fisticuffs. I'm thinking that some participants will choose other games, such as Mario Kart, Rock Paper Scissors, Roshambo, tug-o-war, Battleship, etc.

What forms of brawling do you prefer?
What limitations do we need to deal with? (ie, if there are 20+ people involved, a mario kart tournament can take quite a bit of time, but a roshambo free-for-all might only take seconds ...)

  • 4
    Fastest to log in to SO and vote to close 5 questions?
    – Jon Seigel
    Jan 15, 2010 at 21:48
  • 2
    Two men enter, one man leaves. Thunderdome
    – raven
    Jan 15, 2010 at 23:05
  • What's Roshambo?
    – mmyers
    Jan 15, 2010 at 23:06
  • 2
    @mmyers: first of all, it's spelled rochambeau, second of all, southparkstudios.com/clips/103724
    – raven
    Jan 15, 2010 at 23:19

It would take a little work to implement but perhaps a workable solution would be for it to turn into a poll (after 5 votes each way), showing how many votes each side has. Once there's a preset differential, say 10 clear votes, the question can be locked as either closed or opened, with any further voting disabled.

Being a global website punch-ups can be a little difficult to organise. Besides which, cattle prods at 5 paces is probably more fun and less damaging.


I'd be up for Fake Plastic Rock.

You must log in to answer this question.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged .