Funny thing is – a good chunk of the mods, admittedly not all, are aboard for what this is about. Some could have small or major reservations. Simple basic courtesy – of treating people with respect is *nice*. We've always been about *being nice* back from the old days. In most cases, it may never come up. Sometimes it *really* matters. I've always said the COC should be a shield. Some folks actually need this shield, and they're members of our community. We shouldn't be failing them - as we apparently have had a few times. That's a huge tragedy here. We've basically conflated something that's common sense, good neighbourly practices with well, something that's driven a wedge between people. *If someone asks you to use a pronoun in reference to them, it is correct, and you use the correct pronoun* If you think someone is abusing that for silly reasons, it's fine - let a mod know, and presumably it can be reviewed - possibly by someone in the company. We can deal with the excessively clever - but let's try to assume good intent in these situations. If you have trouble with certain constructions - like the *singular they* as a generic, you can make a good faith effort to try. There's a few things that confuse me too (Is it “they is”? or “they are”?) but we can work that out in time. > I'll call you whatever you want me to call you *That* works Getting it right doesn't hurt your content quality either. We do have bigger problems - in terms of the sheer amount of hostility and drama and the underlying causes of that. We can try to work out ways to help folks or communicate better and build bridges between the company and people? [![Why not both?][1]][1] [1]: https://i.sstatic.net/BTFMw.jpg